For a family who cannot conceive and bear a child themselves but that still wants a child of their own combined genes gestational surrogacy is a possible solution. The arrangement is not one to enter lightly for either the parents or the woman who will carry and deliver the baby. With a thorough understanding of the difficulties, which include matters that are emotional, physical, legal, and financial, using a surrogate can be the best option for a couple who cannot otherwise have a child of their own.

Basics of Gestational Surrogacy

In a typical surrogate situation, an embryo is created using the egg and sperm of the parents and then implanted in the surrogate’s uterus. This involves a procedure using assisted reproductive technology; typically IVF, or in vitro fertilization, is utilized. If tests have proven that the mother’s egg is unlikely to result in a successful embryo, the surrogate can also provide the egg, using the father’s sperm to inseminate her when she is ovulating. In less common situations, both egg and sperm can come from donors.

Reasons to Use a Surrogate

Most couples turn to gestational surrogacy after thoroughly exploring the aspects of their infertility. This includes determining the causes and potential treatments of infertility, if any causes can be discerned and any treatments are available. A surrogate is a good idea when the mother has health problems or is infertile in ways that simply render pregnancy and delivery impossible. When her uterus is irregular, or missing altogether, and if treatments to encourage fertility have failed, other options must be considered. These options include adoption, both regular and planned, as well as the different types of surrogacy.

Questions to Consider Before Using a Surrogate

There are two basic questions that are very important before pursuing the options of using gestational surrogacy to have a baby. The first is whether or not all of the options, including fertilization treatments and adoption, have been carefully considered. The second is the motivation behind having a baby in the first place. For a couple that simply desires a baby of their own biological makeup, the latter question will not take much effort. If, on the other hand, the desire for a baby comes as an attempt to save a relationship, or simply because other couples are having babies, the costs are very high.

Another question to be weighed is whether the mother will be able to comfortably accept another woman having carried her child. Pregnancy is a time of high hormonal changes and an intense bond developed between the growing child and the woman carrying that child. Not only will the intended mother be missing that bonding time, but another woman will feel that intense connection to her baby, even though she will be surrendering the baby as agreed. Both partners need to enter into surrogacy with the knowledge that involvement and support will be needed from each during a difficult and stressful time. Also, both partners need to be ready to face the possibility of a failed pregnancy, even after all of the arrangements, effort, and cost.

Adding Up the Costs

Using a surrogate is expensive, even with a free volunteer as the carrier. Many would-be parents are shocked by the number of expenses that enter into the process. These include:

• Legal fees to represent both the parents and the surrogate.
• Thorough medical testing for both parents and surrogate.
• Any necessary psychological testing for all parties.
• Procedures such as egg retrieval, in vitro fertilization, and medications which are not covered by medical insurance.
• Medical insurance coverage for the carrier, if she lacks it, or financial compensation for her medical expenses.
• Compensation for the surrogate for any matters that arise due to the gestational surrogacy, such as lost wages.
• Any necessary expenses if the carrier must travel.
• When going through an agency, any fees the agency charges.

Legal Matters of Gestational Surrogacy

Some future parents on the path of using gestational surrogacy might be tempted to skip legal representation as a means of cutting costs, but this is unwise. Giving up a child after nine months of pregnancy can be a jarringly difficult action, and without legal protection for the biological parents, the surrogate might decide to struggle to keep the child. The rights of both the surrogate and biological parents are important in this complicated, delicate process, and must be guarded.

An additional legal consideration is that gestational surrogacy is not legal in every state. While some states omit mention of the subject altogether, they can still choose whether or not to enforce contracts or declare them void. Some states allow it only in certain circumstances, such as for married couples only, or only without compensation for the carrier. Thorough research ahead of time, as well as the advice of legal experts or surrogacy agencies, will help avoid potential legal pitfalls.The decision to go through the process of gestational surrogacy is a momentous one. The process is long, expensive, can involve awkward moments, and is difficult for the emotions of all parties involved. Some biological parents are involved through the surrogate’s time of pregnancy and even beyond the birth, others have limited contact before and none when the baby is born and the legal and financial matters are settled. In the end, for couples determined but unable to have a biological child without outside help, the result is well worth the costs in every respect.